A Story of Resilience and Persistence In The Face of Adversity
Everyone Has A Story. Here's My Dad's Story.
Not going to lie, but Father’s Day was rough this year.
There were tons of posts from people celebrating their dads. I was overwhelmed by feelings of grief. I lost my Appa in December 2020. It was the second Father’s Day without him.
I grew up in a dysfunctional family and spent a significant part of my adult life blaming my parents for everything. That’s the millennial way! I talk about trauma and working past trauma on Heal with Sushil, but I do not blame my parents anymore. Despite coming from abject poverty, they gave us the best they could. I have immense gratitude for everything they gave me.
I wanted to share the story of grit that was my dad’s life.
A Little Boy’s Dream
Dad was the oldest of 6 children, born in a challenging era, post-independence India. His father never had a stable source of income. My dad and his siblings grew up with nothing and have experienced starvation at some point in their childhoods.
To distract from this broke-ass existence, Appa would spend most of his days sitting on the walls surrounding Bombay Airport. He would watch the planes fly over for hours on end.
He dreamed that some day, he would love to fly in an airplane.
A Childhood Cut Short
In response to intense early trauma, dad’s childhood was cut short. I would even say it was non-existent.
At 17, he finished high school and jumped into the workforce.
He took up a job at The Law Offices of P.N. Ganeshan, where he worked with comptometers. These were mathematical devices before the invention of computers. He had a very unpleasant boss in this job, but he rapidly picked up this skill and got promoted to being a comptometer instructor. His English also greatly improved when he worked there.
He used these skills to leapfrog into his next job.
One Step Closer
After mastering his last job, he got a job in a company that brought him closer to his dream of flying. He got an admin job at Indian Airlines (now Air India), where he worked in the booking office.
He did not have a bachelor’s degree. What he did have were bomb networking and communication skills.
He made strong connections with pilots and cabin crew members in the airline. Within no time, he was managing all of their vacation itineraries. Ganesh became a name that everyone called on in the booking office.
Tasting the Dream and Then Living It
The best perks of working for an airline included the free staff tickets available each year.
He realized his dream of flying in an airplane in his early 20s, but this was just the tip of the iceberg.
In 1982 there was an office circular. They were promoting in-house for a new batch of cabin crew members. When he applied for this job, his network of pilots and crew members vouched for him. He passed the assessment with flying colors and got the promotion.
He was finally in a dream job where he could fly every day.
Best Dad I Could Have Asked For
Being in an airline was the dream job but very demanding as well. Dad was constantly faced with unruly & entitled passengers, sleep deprivation due to variable work hours, and long durations away from family.
Not once have I heard him complain about his job and how challenging it was to provide for a family.
For 40 years he worked hard to ensure that his family never faced the same adversities that he did. He made sure that we never faced starvation, always had a roof over our heads, and the best education. I am very fortunate and grateful to have had a life of privilege.
My dad wasn’t big on social media, but he had connected with 1000s of people in the OG way of connecting with people. When he passed, grief-stricken messages poured in from 100s of people. I had no idea dad had touched so many lives."
We had a complicated relationship but learning his story and hardships made me realize that I had a wonderful father who loved me & gave me amazing gifts like:
The love for animals.
The value of connecting with people.
The Gift of Laughter (he was the funniest person I knew)
Treating everyone the same way, irrespective of what their story was.
Thanks, Dad! I’ll see you on the other side.